Are You On the List?

So how does one get on the mother-of-all lists? The Jonathan Lee Riches lawsuit list?
I confess that I am utterly fascinated with this guy. Never even heard of him until today. Presenting for your enjoyment a roundup from the internet and blogosphere the wackiness that is Jonathan Lee Riches:

From Dreadnaught, via Ace a complaint from July naming as defendents Gitmo, Abu Ghraib, Bataan Death March, and Shawshank Redemption (among others). How do you name a movie as a defendent? He's seeking 728 trillion dollars and claiming that the defendents have built secret tunnels that connect around the world and that they force him to eat live rats and roll in kitty litter for punishment.

This guy is freakin' hilarious! I just can't get enough!

For more laughs see these:

Here's the original 57-page lawsuit filed in 2006 with almost every defendent you can name (except me). There doesn't seem to be a complaint in this one, however. (also from Ace)

And of course, the one that started it for me: The complaint against Michael Vick for 63 billion dollars. Ha! It alleges that Vick stole his dogs, sold them on eBay and then used the proceeds to buy missiles from Iran.

It's worth noting that Mr. Vick pledged his allegiance to al-Qaida, so you can't really be surprised by the dog-eBay-Iranian missile play. I mean, didn't we all see that one coming?

link via Girls Gone Sports

and certainly not least, the complaint against the Jewish Mossad, the CIA and Larry King Live which asserts that Larry King is a voodoo witch doctor.

Good Times.

Someone has got to interview this guy and see if he's really nuts or if he's just killin' time.

Another Video!!!

Great Line:
"Their lack of rhythm, it's affecting our crops."

Best Line:
"Some people are saying, that, in a hundred years, we'll be the minorities."(laughs)
via Right Wing News

Can I Get An AMEN?

Matt Moore - The Future Looks Bright...

So I watched the pre-season Cowboys last night and took away one good thing:

I'm in serious like with Matt Moore - I really hope he is put on the roster.

In Which We Find Trouble at the DMV

Actually in Texas, it's the DPS (Department of Public Safety).

So the Boyfriend is in the process of giving up his New York State identity to become a full-fledged Texan, and this morning it warranted a trip to the DPS to get a Texas Driver's License.

Had to make a few stops first, though. Before you can get a TX DL you have to get your truck registered in the state.

But, before you can have your truck registered in the state, you must have your truck inspected in the state.

Guess how many places we went before we figured this out???

Once we finally made it to the DPS, most of the morning had elapsed and the Boyfriend was in an awful mood. Standing in line for 30 minutes did not make it any better. In front of us was the smelly guy with 9 piercings on his face (I counted, I had the time) and behind us was the smelly lady with a mustache who kept licking her lips loudly. And I'm not just saying smelly to be mean. The pincushion guy smelled like stale cigarette smoke, and as he had been waiting in line for 1/2 and hour like us, he was also getting agitated and kept exhaling those big puffy breaths that let everyone know that you are just about done waiting. Oooooh - the stink!

The chubby lady behind us just had really bad B.O. Someone introduce her to a shower please!

So we finally get up to the counter and we have with us the proper form all filled out in black ink, the Boyfriend's valid NY State License, the copy of the TX registration, the copy of the TX inspection, a Social Security earnings statement (he's lost his card) and his valid Passport.

Guess what? No Social Security Card, no TX Driver's License. After all that other gov't issued crap with pictures and fingerprints and SS Numbers everywhere - no dice. She told us we had to go to the SS Administration (guess how long that line was???) and either order a new card or get a Social Security Verification form signed and notarized.

The Boyfriend does not want to be a Texan anymore.

I can't say I blame him.

I Call Bullshit!

Why would I want a "feminine guy"? I'm already pretty feminine. Some wacky scientists in England say that women prefer feminine looking men as long-term partners rather than masculine looking men. WTF???

Here's an actual quote from the article:

Men with square jaws, larger noses and smaller eyes were classed as significantly more dominant, less faithful, worse parents and as having less warm personalities.

Well I'm sure glad that someone alerted me, because now I must get rid of my 6'2 square-jawed, large-honkered(is that a word?) boyfriend who I actually planned to marry and have children with!!

Who are the idiots coming up with this lame-ass crap about what's attractive? Are they the gay-looking effeminate dorks who spend their time in science labs or are they man-hating feminazi's who just happen to be straight.

I just don't get it. What woman wants to be with a man who is pretty?

Every morning I come to work and before I'm able to function in a money-making capacity, I must read the goings-on in the blogosphere. It's my routine, you see. And every morning I tell myself that I'm only going to read my one "news" page (the Drudge Report) and my 3 must-read's for the day (Instapundit, La Shawn Barber and Michelle Malkin, in that order). Then I tell myself that I'm going to close my browser and get busy. 2 hours later, I'm still going, clicking around the internet, obsessed with some story or another, wanting to see everyones take on it.

This morning I counted how many blogs are in my favorites folder - there are 50. I read probably half of them each day and I check Drudge and Instapundit all day for the updates. The truth is, I don't really start working until after I get back from lunch.

Oh, the guilty conscience!!! I beat myself up every night for not having the discipline to work a full day. But guess what? I'm doing far better at my job than ever before! I pondered this last night and I've come to the conclusion that each afternoon when I buckle down, I just become more efficient.

I had a job once working for an accounting firm in a secretarial/administrative capacity and I was told MORE THAN ONCE by the other support staff to slow down. I was told to stretch my assignments out all day, because if I didn't then I would be given more work and I would make the other support staff look bad. Well, I didn't want either thing to happen. So I learned to look like I was working. Remember the scene in Office Space where the guy tells the consultants, "I work just hard enough not to get fired". That, my friends is how it is.

Now, having my own office, and my own hours, it just hit me that I don't have to work all day from 8 to 5 and make it stretch. If my work only takes 4 straight hours to accomplish, then so be it.

It feels good.

Shalom

It's Potter Time!!!!!!

I admit it - I am a Harry Potter fanatic!! I've spent the last week re-reading the books to get ready for the big day. I'm actually going to go get my reserved copy tomorrow morning rather than midnight tonight. If I were in high school, or college even, I might do the midnight thing, but for someone my age - it's a little gay.

I've been avoiding all Harry Potter-related websites like the plague because I don't want to spoil it. I also have a few theories as to what will happen and as I found myself ruminating (big word!) on said theories, I realized that in reading the final book I would be looking for validation and that might ruin the pure enjoyment of surprise as I turn each page.

So I'll try, unsuccessfully I'm sure, to not look for the answers to the BIG questions and just wait until it hits me in the face. The big question on my mind is, of course, is Snape good or evil? I've been going with good for the last year, but after reading the last book again yesterday, I'm not so sure. It would be a sad reflection upon Dumbledore to have been so wrong in him, but who knows? I also think that Malfoy and one of the Weasly's will be killed in the final book (Percy maybe?). I'll know tomorrow night. I can't wait!!!!!!

A Plague On Both Your Houses!

Trust...

Is Never Having to Enforce the Law;
Just Pass a New One
(and don't enforce that one either!)

Tony Snow says to the American People on behalf of the President "We heard you." Then he goes on to tell us "all that is going on with the bill". In effect he's saying, "Trust us. Look at all we're doing to put a really good smokescreen in place so it won't hurt so bad when we do what we want to do anyway."

Two things have to happen for me to even think about comtemplating if I might ever want to possibly accept this Administration's policy of instant Amnesty (I never will, but I might pretend to listen, just out of politeness)

From the President's June 8th radio address:

[W]e are now committing more resources than ever before to border security, doubling the number of Border Patrol agents, building hundreds of miles of fencing...

1) I don't care how many Border Patrol agents you put on the Border, they will be too afraid to do anything useful until they know they can do their job and be judged fairly. That WILL NOT happen until Agents Compean and Ramos are pardoned by President Bush.

He must do this because it is the right thing to do and he must work to restore faith among those of us who put our faith in him.

2) The asinine provision that probationary benefits are available within 24 hours of application must be taken out of the bill. This illustrates the unbelievable feeling of superiority that Members of Congress and the President are showing to their constituents. If that provision is in the bill, and stays in the bill, nothing else in the bill matters. Not. one. single. thing.

Amnesty Roundup

I have a few friends who don't keep up with politics like I do (not that I am in any way an expert) and have become very interested in the Crap-O-Rama that is the Amnesty for Aliens issue currently gripping our nation. So, on their behalf, I present a one-stop shopping list of websites, and blogs for the Amnesty virgin. Enjoy!

First and foremost go see Michelle Malkin's website. She is all over this! Not only does she know what she's talking about when it comes to the Amnesty issue, she is an insider who is privy to much that Joe America isn't aware of, and she not only alerts the public, but backs up her information by posting the documentation.

From her website you can fax your Senator and tell them what you think, or you can call the Amnesty hotline to get directly connected to your Senator's office.

Block out an hour or so and spend some time over there - she liveblogged the debates last week, and you can bet she'll liveblog the next round that we all expect to come around again this month.

Next, go on over to the Kausfiles. If you can't find it at Michelle's, Mickey will have it.

For the most comprehensive information on the problems caused by illegal aliens unlawfully residing in the U.S., go to Numbers USA. This site has loads of info from census figures to discussions on anchor babies and chain migration. (h/t again to Michelle. I found this site via her blog, and now go there every day!)

It also has a great roundup of the voting records of Congress. Lots and lots of information here!

Also, support this group. They are a group of Americans of Hispanic ancestry and they want the rest of America to know that the pro-illegal alien crowd does not speak for them. Support them any way you can!

Check out Rep. Tom Tancredo's (R-CO) site. He's an early opponent to Amnesty and has been fighting this issue for years. In case you weren't aware, he's running for President.

Lastly, see this page from Jeff Sessions (R-AL) website which details the 20 biggest loopholes in the Amnesty plan. (Since the plan is "not quite dead", it's important to know these loopholes and watch to see how many changes are made when it comes back to the Senate floor).

That should be plenty to get you Amnesty virgins started!

Sopranos - Much Ado About Nothing

Like most people last night, I thought my TV went out during the Sopranos. So today's backlash doesn't surprise me one bit. For me, the only highlight of last night was Phil Leotardo getting whacked and then run over. That and Agent Harris cheering about the hit.

I'm annoyed that there was no closure. I feel completely unsatisfied. What's going to happen to Silvio? What about AJ? He's done a 360 in about 4 weeks.

The boyfriend reminded me: When has a series finale ever lived up to the hype? True, but couldn't they have at least tried?

Sports Day

I'm gettin' my sports groove back, so here's a quick roundup of what went on this weekend - well, what I cared about following anyway.

Spurs win, but apparently, no one cares. Not even the Spurs fans.

(links via Deadspin)


Aggies are eliminated, but it was a surprise that they got this far in the first place this year.

The Yankees win one. Finally.

The Big Criminals Helping the Little Criminals

I've been watching the Amnesty debate on C-Span, and to be honest, it's mind-numbing. I've never really spent time watching Congressional debates, and I confess, I keep getting a bit flummoxed. We all know that politicians are highly skilled at double-speak, but I admit, I'm a bit impressed.

Not in a good way.

(O/T - why is Trent Lott ass-kissing the Chappaquiddick killer?)

I'm doing better by reading Michelle Malkin's liveblogging posts, with her commentary.

What I see on the whole, is that the members of Congress really are Corrupt Criminals (well maybe not Jeff Sessions).

To me, this is meeting of the Mafia bigwigs sitting around the table dividing up the territories to parcel out to their illegal alien underlings.

I'm truly disgusted.

A reply to Ted's comment...

Let me answer the second question first. There is conflict within Alex. (Short for Alexandra) I've decided it helps drive the story and makes infiltration easier to make Alex black. Because she's military and comes from an intact family w/ a military background, she is naturally of a conservative, patriotic bent. She will struggle with her "ethnic contemporaries". You know, the black conservative types that are seen as sellouts. Is she a sellout? Is she risking her life for a country that sees her as unequal?

She also struggles when she's undercover and away from home with pulling herself "out of submission" as it were and regaining her inner strength within herself. It's turning into a tug of war for her as she keeps her cover of a good Muslim woman, but tries to keep her sanity.

At this point I'm still working on her childhood. I want her to come from a stable, intact family, and one of the plot points I'm working on is where her intense drive to work in this manner for her country comes from. I wanted something in her childhood to trigger it. When I thought back to my childhood, I remembered writing letters to the hostages in Iran in grade school. After doing some research on the real hostages, I discovered that one of the hostages kept was a black military man. I may use this piece of non-fiction to structure Alex's parents. Having my father or a beloved uncle as one of those hostages would certainly give me a different outlook.

I should be embarrassed that something like this happens in my state.

Strangely, probably due to my Redneck gene, I'm not.

From Deadspin and You Been Blinded

I especially love this observation from Deadspin:

So much to work with here. First, the initial heckler was the guy's cousin. And then, when the guy starting firing buckshot, the player asked if anyone in the crowd had a gun ... and somebody did! Baseball's so much more fun in East Texas.

My Novel

I was asked what my novel was about. So without getting too much into it (I keep changing plot points anyway), it's essentially a contemporary intrigue/spy novel, a la Tom Clancy. The main character is a woman.

Basically she's a spy and following current events, instead of infiltrating the KGB like much of Clancy, she's infiltrating Muslim extremists by impersonating a devout Muslim woman.

She's turning into a very interesting character and I'm having fun devloping her history. One thing she will not have is superhuman strength - There won't be a lot of physical, ass-kicking combat on her part. I'm always annoyed by books and movies that give a 120lb woman the capability to immobilize a 200lb bad guy. She will be resorting to cleverness and feminine wiles. She will not be a tart. That's not to say there will be no physical fighting - she is an American-military trained operative.

There will be much Globe-trotting on her part, but so far the bulk of the story is set in Paris, with a bit in North Africa. I'm going back and forth on making this an actual CIA-sanctioned op, or Rogue Agent with a Score to Settle - I'll guess I'll just have to see what happens.

Someone fix the Hyperdrive on the Millineum Falcon...Quick!

Wow - It seems there may be a planet that could sustain life, just like Earth. (via Instapundit

Green Musings

I think the current Global Warming schtick is a crock of shit. The reason I think this is that I just don't believe that scientists, or humans for that matter have collected enough data through the ages to support the theory. We humans just have not been around long enough, nor have we had the technology long enough to know what's REALLY going on.

On top of that, I believe that we humans, or we-humans-who-believe-in-global-warming, are giving humankind WAY too much credit. To say that we're killing the planet and that we must save it, is extremely narcisscistic in my humble opinion. It may be true that we are contributing to climate change, but my bullshit detector tells me its not on the scale that the eco-nuts are telling us.

I believe that its all really a cycle. The Earth is organic, and like all organic things, it is born, or created, it grows, it matures, and it dies. I believe that no matter what mankind does to hurt the planet, or to try to save the planet - it won't matter. It's going to die someday. That being said:

I don't advocate doing all we can to try to ruin the planet, but let's use some common sense people! Most scientific advancements have improved the quality of life for humans; from the 2-ply TP to the MRI machine at the hospital. There are plenty of ways to minimize output - and they're cost saving.

In the spring and fall, open windows instead of running the a/c, or light a fire instead of running the heater. Use candles with hurricane glasses on the back porch instead of installing more light fixtures. Do what ALL our mom's did and reuse aluminum foil, etc. That's plain common sense, and each family can do what suits it best - many probably already do because there's an added bonus of saving money.

On the other hand, don't buy extra expensive light bulbs that do something good for the environment, just turn on the lights only when needed. Don't spend extra money on a lush lawn if you live where water is scarce - xeriscape. Use wash cloths and cloth napkins in place of paper towels and paper napkins. If none of these suit you, then don't. It's your choice.

But on no account should you deprive yourself of modern conveniences that have made the world better, like an SUV for the family vacation, and on no account should you walk around with a stinky butt. You go right on ahead and use as many squares of TP you need to get your rear end clean - and don't feel guilty about it.

Jumping on the Virginia Tech Bandwagon

Many times, when I'm reading blogs, I don't post because everyone else is already posting, and I usually echo the sentiments of the blogs I read. Hmmm. Maybe I should read more leftie blogs and fire off a response post. But I just have to post something about the VA Tech murders after reading post after post and comment after comment.

Here is the article that Glenn Reynolds wrote in the NY Daily News (linked to from Instapundit) and here is the WSJ commentary from David Kopel (also from Instapundit). And lastly, from La Shawn Barber is this commentary.

All state the fundamental truth that when you ban guns, only criminals and those with criminal intent will have them, since breaking the law is requisite to criminality.

As for myself, although I'm not a handgun owner, I am a rifle and shotgun owner. I have seriously thought about purchasing a handgun since I live alone and I also travel alone (by car). One reason I've never purchased a handgun and gotten the CCL to go with it, is because I've been told that it's illegal to carry a loaded pistol across state lines. And that it is also illegal to have a loaded pistol in your vehicle, even while driving inside my state. I honestly do not know if these statements are accurate.

I will be finding out, though, as I will be purchasing a handgun forthwith and obtaining a CCL. In addition, I will be consciously breaking each and every law I can when I come near a sign that says "gun-free zone". I'll still be packing. And I'll happily pay the fine or sit my butt in jail if I get caught. Not only that, I'll be driving across state lines with my new friend without a second thought.

Why bother having a weapon to defend yourself if you're not allowed anywhere with it?

I suppose it's my version of civil disobedience.